Archive for July 15, 2010

“You’re not going to believe what happened to me today!” Lizzie McWydeville said as she flopped onto her sister’s bed. “I just met the dreamiest guy!”

With a sigh of impatience, Anne closed her book with a snap and turned to her older sister.

“He’s so tall!” Lizzie gushed rolling onto her back, a languid hand on her forehead.  “And like totally hot!”

“So, the spell worked then?” Anne said.

“He was all you’re so beautiful! and I was all no my hair’s such a mess and OMG! I hope he didn’t see my shoes!” she screwed her eyes up in mortification. “They don’t even go with my dress!”

“Yeah, you’re such a dog!” Anne said sarcastically looking at her beautiful sister jealously because she was so beautiful and Anne was… Anne was just Anne! She sighed. Maybe she shouldn’t be so mean. Lizzie couldn’t help being beautiful, it was just the way she was made. But it just made her so mad that she got everything and Anne got nothing!

Lizzie blew a strand of silver gilt hair out of her eyes and closed them. “Oh, Annie! You should have seen him!”  She wrapped her arms around herself and hugged herself.  “I think I want to marry him!”

“Wasn’t that the whole point of the spell?” Anne was getting impatient now. Her mother never cast a spell to find her a handsome and powerful boyfriend! Just another example of Lizzie being Mommy’s favourite. It wasn’t fair!

“I’m going to,” Lizzie declared in a logical tone.  “I’m going to marry him! Just you wait and see!”

Over in France, the Earl of Warwick cast a quizzical eye over the young Bona of the Savoy. She’ll do all right, he thought. Ned’s really going to like her and he’ll be really pleased that I’ve found him the perfect prom date… queen.

“My friend really likes you,” he said boldly. “Do you like him?”

“I don’t know,” Bona said. “Maybe.”

“So that’s settled,” King Louis the Xith said rubbing his hands in triumph. “I’ll sort out the invitations.”

“Can you give this note to Margaret?” Warwick said shyly taking a note out of his pocket and giving it to Louis the IXth. “It’s just ah… it’s just ah…” Then he turned bright red and looked at his boots mumbling “it’s not important.”

Louis, who was a schemer and always up to no good, took the note and read it secretly. “I still think your hot!” It said.  “I can’t stop thinking about you.” Then it went on to quote the lines of some mooshy song that Lois had never heard of before. Louise watched as Warwick left the room, still looking at his boots and still bright red with embarrassment, and thought to himself “Hmmm. This is all very interesting!”

Back in England, Ned and Lizzie were holding hands. Ned was very pleased with himself for having found himself such a hot girl. Lizzie was pleased with herself becuase she was sure that Ned was more than he said he was. She had a sneaking suspicion that he might be the king in disguise!

“Can I kiss you?” he said shyly.

“Not unless you’re going to marry me,” Lizzie declared firmly.

“But I’m supposed to be marrying Bona of the Savoy!”

“Well then,” Lizzie pouted prettily. “You can’t kiss me then, can you?”

Then Ned had a really good idea. If he married Lizzie secretly, no-one would know and he could kiss her all he wanted.

So the next day, which was the 1st of May and the perfect day for a secret wedding, Ned and Lizzie secretly got married in a secret wedding. Then he kissed her and he thought, “This is a bit of all right!” so he kissed her again.

It was only on the way home that he thought, Uh-oh, Warwick’s not going to like this! But it was too late now.